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Listen, Talkin' Headline Blues

The Talkin’ Headline Blues #95

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The Talkin' Headline Blues #95

Well. That was surprisingly easy even though my bones and skin feel reversed and my head is somewhere floating behind my body. (I’m talking about THIS.)

Maybe it was SO SIMPLE, though, because these CNN.com headlines were written so well. THANKS CNN. You’re THE BEST. You make everything sound so ridiculous that I don’t even have to worry about any of it being real.

It’s not real, right? CNN.com turned into the Onion, right? Pure satire, right? Because these headlines CAN’T be actual news.

Or, wait…I did get stuck on Interstate 290 heading out of Chicago Monday morning because of a…train crash. UH OH.

But maybe that’s the only real news item, right? RIGHT!? Please tell me yes. I can’t deal with anything serious right now, okay?

Listen, Talkin' Headline Blues

The Talkin’ Headline Blues #94

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The Talkin' Headline Blues #94

This took me probably about 107 attempts to record. I think it took so long mainly because of what I wrote about in this Medicated Artist post over on MusicVomit.net.

But also because the headlines for this week had way too many words in them. THANKS CNN. I thought you were supposed to be making the news simpler. Easier. Less words next week, please!

Now back to your day….

Listen, Talkin' Headline Blues

The Talkin’ Headline Blues #92

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The Talkin' Headline Blues #92

Hmm…this did not come out of my mouth as smooth as intended. It did not roll off my lips and teeth like a talkin’ blues song usually does. It does not sound like the Columbia River.

My voice sounds beat up. Bruised. Hurt.

Really it’s just over-rested. Unused. Hurt.

But anyway, here are the tip-top very-best headlines for the week from CNN.com. They just never quit over there (down there?) in Atlanta, huh?

Keep churning them out, okay? Because it just keeps me giggling. And keeps me in practice.

Listen, Talkin' Headline Blues

The Talkin’ Headline Blues #91

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The Talkin' Headline Blues #91

Oh yeah…it’s fun to write songs and play guitar. I forget that from time to time.

Anyway. Here’s the next installment in the Talkin’ Headline Blues. Thanks writers at CNN.com. Keep up the work.

Listen, Talkin' Headline Blues

The Talkin’ Headline Blues #89

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The Talkin' Headline Blues #89

Well, I haven’t done a Talkin’ Headline like this in a long time.

Made me giggle.

This is how a Talkin’ Blues SHOULD SOUND. That’s something you’ll hear someone say who’s really serious about Folk Music. Someone who knows ALL THE RULES. Someone who’s a lot better at musical instrumentation than I am.

At various points in time I have been that someone.

At this point in time, I’m not. I’m just enjoying myself. I’ll take note of that. Things go up and things go down. That’s how it is.

These are the headlines for this week, though. No more news, okay CNN.com? Please?! I can’t take in any more except for this! I mean it! Please don’t make me! My brain is not that big….