Tag Archives: recording

Viagra Racist: The Talkin’ Headline Blues #161

The Talkin’ Headline Blues is a weekly series of recordings using unedited headlines from CNN.com written as a song. This week’s topic: Viagra Racist.

Viagra Racist: The Talkin' Headline Blues #161
Feeling not so terrific and super-classy in your lady bits? This is what Female Viagra can do for you!

Everything fun!
Trump convicted on failure to America.
The racist tweet machine forced a Viagra cruise.

Boy howdy! CNN really likes writing articles about fleshy bullhorn Donald Trump, no? Maybe they’d write about him less if he changed his name back to Donald Drumpf as John Oliver suggested:

Anyway, read all the CNN Drumpf articles for yourself, and then go #MakeDonaldDrumpfAgain:

Presidential STDs: The Talkin’ Headline Blues #160

The Talkin’ Headline Blues is a weekly series of recordings using unedited headlines from CNN.com written as a song. This week’s topic: Presidential STDs.

Presidential STDs: The Talkin' Headline Blues #160
Steer clear of all political candidate cavities (oral, anal, etc.) and your chance of contracting a presidential STD will be minimal.

Quit the invisible rules.
American nightmare from presidential love.
Drink snake STDs.
Paradise, a weird salute.

Here are the headlines used to write the song. It’s more news than you’ll ever need.

Scalia’s Big One: The Talkin’ Headline Blues #159

The Talkin’ Headline Blues is a weekly series of recordings using unedited headlines from CNN.com written as a song. This week’s topic: Scalia’s Big One.

Scalia's Big One: The Talkin' Headline Blues #159
Former Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia’s Big One is MUCH BIGGER than this.

Scalia’s ‘Big One’ impaled Beyonce.
Joke seeks former new arrest count.
What Russia’s love done found out.

And, yes, I have again compiled all the links to all the headlines if you have a hard-up head cold and need to put yourself to rest. Read on!

Ugly Earth: The Talkin’ Headline Blues #158

The Talkin’ Headline Blues is a weekly series of recordings using unedited headlines from CNN.com written as a song. This week’s topic: Ugly Earth.

Ugly Earth: The Talkin' Headline Blues #158
Ugly, messy, destructive, vomiting, beautiful, terrifying Earth.

New meteorite parade escalates ugly
Earth at daily sledding reveal.
Ban controversy!
Mosquitoes sink duck ride.

Here are all the headlines used for the song. And links to read the articles, although for most of the articles you can just look quickly at the headline and get the idea of what happened. No need to read anything in depth at all.

No Longer Can I Hide (Version 2)

No Longer Can I Hide (Version 2)This here is a rewritten song of a tune, No Longer Can I Hide, that I originally wrote WAY BACK in April 2011. That’s so long ago that I have no idea what the original song is even about, if, in fact, it was ever about anything. You can read all about it in the original post right here, though, and see that I didn’t even really know what it was about when I first wrote it.

Also, seems that when I originally wrote this, my 5-year-old, who was then only like 18 months, was just out of the hospital after a serious eye infection. It was swelled up like a baseball. His eye is okay now. But, of course, anytime it’s a little bit red my wife and I look at each other and are like, “HERE WE GO.”

Staying in the hospital with a kid is horrible. Pray you never have to do it. If you do, though, don’t order the chocolate cake for yourself on your kid’s hospital dinner menu. THE NURSE WILL KNOW IT’S FOR YOU. She will scowl at you.

ANYWAY.

So, since I had no clue about this tune, and I’m just getting back into some serious songwriting, I started off by playing through a few old tunes to see if I could steal any melodies or phrases or ideas. Songs like “The Rovin’ Gambler” and “Freight Train” (been really into that one lately) and “San Francisco Bay Blues.”

Then I got an idea to do a song about how sometimes it seems so much better to just be all alone and hid away than to be anywhere around anyone else.

Turns out that’s not really true all the time. Turns out I’ve got a few people I’d rather be around than be left all lonesome.

So that’s the rewritten song for this week. That’s two weeks in a row. I reward myself with beers.